How Can Therapy For Parents Of Children and Adolescents With Gender Dysphoria Help?

Gender dysphoria can be a complex and overwhelming experience, not only for the child experiencing it but also for the parents trying to support them. As a therapist, I’ve seen firsthand the deep distress gender dysphoria can cause in families.

One of the most common questions I receive from parents is, “How can I help my child?” This article will explore how therapy can help parents of children and adolescents with gender dysphoria navigate their emotions, improve communication, and provide the support their children need.

What Is Gender Dysphoria?

Gender dysphoria refers to the conflict between a person’s assigned gender at birth and their internal sense of identity. For children and teens experiencing this distress, the disconnect between their physical body and gender identity can lead to anxiety, depression, and feelings of isolation.

In some cases, these youth may experience such profound discomfort that they develop unhealthy coping mechanisms, like self-harm, or even experience suicidal thoughts. As a parent, learning about gender dysphoria is the first step in supporting your child.

Impact of Gender Dysphoria on Adolescents

Adolescents experiencing gender dysphoria may withdraw from social activities, develop body dysphoria, or even refuse to attend school. They may avoid situations that highlight their gendered body, such as sports or pool parties. Gender dysphoria therapy can help identify these warning signs and give parents tools to help their children navigate these challenging feelings.

Support through Gender-Affirming Care

Social Transition – Social transition is often the first step for many transgender and nonbinary youth. This includes using a new name, different pronouns, and changing their appearance to match their gender identity. This support is crucial to their well-being and your relationship with them!

Medical Transition – For some transgender youth, medical transition is part of their gender-affirming journey. This might include puberty blockers, hormone therapy, or even gender-confirming surgery.

It’s important to work with healthcare providers who understand gender dysphoria to ensure that any medical decisions are made carefully and in the best interest of the child. Chicago is fortunate to have numerous world-renowned providers – University of Chicago’s Trans CARE Clinic and Lurie Children’s Hospital Gender Development Program and Clinic.

Research Suggests that Parents Play a Crucial Role for Their Trans and Non-Binary Children

A recent study examined the mental health outcomes of transgender children who are supported by their families during social transitions (Olson, K., 2022). These researchers found that children who are affirmed in their gender identity—through changes such as preferred names, pronouns, and appearance—show significantly better mental health outcomes compared to those who lack such support.

In fact, they have no higher levels of depression or anxiety compared to their cisgender peers. Similarly, Tordoff, D., and colleagues (2022) found that transgender and nonbinary youths receiving support—whether social or medical—had lower rates of depression and suicidal thoughts over a 12-month period.

Both studies confirm that when parents actively support their child’s gender identity, it not only fosters well-being but also strengthens the parent-child relationship during an otherwise challenging period.

However, supporting trans and non-binary children and adolescents can require a significant emotional lift for parents (and other family members). It’s normal for the whole family to be impacted!

Common Fears and Concerns of Parents

• Doubting Your Child’s Gender Identity – As a parent, it’s natural to feel uncertain or confused when your child starts expressing signs of gender dysphoria. You may wonder if it’s a phase or feel torn between wanting to be supportive and fearing that you’re moving too fast. Therapy provides a safe space to explore these doubts and develop a balanced approach to supporting your child’s journey.
  
  Individual therapy and family therapy can help parents work through doubts and concerns by providing a non-judgmental space to talk openly about their fears. As a gender dysphoria therapist, my goal is to support both the parent and the child by ensuring that parents have the tools to manage their emotions while being there for their child.
• Grief – You may find yourself grieving the gender your child was assigned at birth. This is entirely normal. Gender is deeply tied to societal expectations, and it can take time to adjust to this new understanding of your child. Individual therapy helps parents process this grief in a way that doesn’t burden their child.
• Need to Protect – As a parent, you naturally want to protect your child, and the world can seem particularly hostile toward transgender and nonbinary (TNB) youth. Fear for their safety and well-being is valid. Therapy offers a place to process these fears so that you can approach your child’s journey with a calm, supportive mindset.

Communication is Key to Effective Support!

Communication is key when your child is navigating gender dysphoria. But let’s face it—effective communication doesn’t always come naturally. Gender dysphoria therapy helps parents develop the skills they need to listen actively, avoid judgment, and foster a space where their child feels safe expressing their identity.

The Importance of Active Listening

Active listening means being fully present in the conversation without interrupting or trying to “fix” the situation. By learning this skill, parents can offer emotional support and validate their child’s feelings without imposing their fears or concerns.

Truly listening allows parents to explore what their child is going through, not just from an emotional standpoint but also from a curious, caring, and developmental perspective. Gender dysphoria therapy can also give parents insight into the various stages of their child’s journey and help them understand what support looks like at each step.

Support and Co-Parenting Strategies for Gender-Diverse Youth

How Therapy Can Help Parents Align

Disagreements about parenting can place a lot of stress on your relationship, which can, in turn, impact your child. If you and your co-parent don’t see eye to eye on how to support your child, therapy can help. A skilled therapist can guide parents through their disagreements, helping them to prioritize their child’s well-being while strengthening their own relationship.

Likewise, single parents often feel less alone and more confident in their parenting decisions when supported by another adult, whether that is an individual therapist, a friend, or another parent of a gender-diverse young person.

The Role of a Gender Dysphoria Therapist

A gender dysphoria therapist can be an invaluable resource for both parents and children. Our gender dysphoria therapists specialize in gender-affirming care, helping trans and nonbinary youth explore their identities in a safe, supportive environment. They also guide parents through the complex process of understanding and affirming their child’s gender.

Finding Support Through Therapy!

Parenting a child with gender dysphoria can feel like an overwhelming journey, but you don’t have to do it alone. Therapy provides a supportive space to explore your emotions, communicate more effectively with your child, and understand the nuances of gender dysphoria. By seeking out a gender dysphoria therapist, you’re taking the first step toward helping both yourself and your child thrive.

Gender Affirming Therapy at Tandem Psychology!

If you’re a parent navigating the challenges of supporting a child with gender dysphoria, therapy can offer the guidance and support you need. At Tandem Psychology, our gender dysphoria therapists are here to help you understand your child’s journey and provide the tools necessary to support you! Contact us today to start giving your child your best!

This blog is made for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice. The information in this blog is not intended to (1) replace a one-on-one relationship with a qualified licensed health care provider, (2) create or establish a provider-patient relationship, or (3) create a duty for us to follow up with you.